Navigating the observance of Ramadan with a young child: A guide for the uninitiated
For many Muslim women, Ramadan is a time of increased spirituality, reflection, and connection with their faith. However, for new mothers like Yousra Samir Imran, the holy month can present unique challenges as they navigate the demands of early motherhood.
Yousra, a parent, recalls her pre-motherhood Ramadan experiences as a spiritual bootcamp, filled with Qur'an readings, taraweeh prayers, and qiyam al-layl. But since becoming a mother, her routine has changed significantly. "My child takes hours to settle to sleep at night, making it impossible for me to perform my taraweeh prayers at home," she explains.
Despite these challenges, Yousra finds joy in making decorations and singing nasheeds to her son during Ramadan. She celebrates the small but significant pockets of joy during the holy month, focusing on what she is able to do in this moment.
Balancing spirituality during Ramadan while managing early motherhood and childcare is a significant challenge. However, several strategies rooted in Islamic teachings and psychological insights can help mothers preserve their well-being and deepen their spiritual connection.
Practicing Sabr (patience) is one such strategy. Islam values patience as a key virtue, especially for mothers facing exhaustion or emotional strain. Recognizing that motherhood is both a noble and demanding role can help reframe difficulties as opportunities for spiritual growth.
Embracing imperfection is another important strategy. Accepting that you may not be able to fulfill every Ramadan tradition or daily task to the fullest helps reduce guilt and stress. Focusing on small, meaningful acts of worship rather than perfection is key.
Seeking and accepting help from family, friends, and neighbours is also encouraged in the Islamic tradition. Accepting assistance is not a weakness but a recognition of shared responsibility—viewing the community as a trust (amanah) that uplifts the whole body of believers.
Flexible worship times are essential for new mothers. Utilizing nap times, early mornings, or late nights for prayers, Quran recitation, or personal supplication can help mothers find moments for spirituality amidst their childcare duties.
Involving children in spirituality is another strategy. Simple rituals such as reading Quranic stories, making dua together, or decorating for Ramadan can help integrate spiritual practice into daily routines with children.
Prioritizing rest, mindful nutrition, and hydration are also crucial for maintaining energy levels during Ramadan. Ensuring adequate sleep, eating nourishing meals, and staying hydrated can help new mothers manage the physical demands of the holy month.
Recognizing signs of burnout, such as constant fatigue, overwhelm, irritability, and feelings of inadequacy, is essential. Addressing these early by seeking support and resetting expectations can help prevent burnout.
Openness to vulnerability is another important strategy. Allowing yourself to be vulnerable and express your needs to your community not only builds stronger relationships but also fulfills the spiritual principle of mutual care.
By integrating these strategies, new mothers can nurture both their faith and their family during Ramadan. Yousra, for one, hopes that the attitude surrounding Muslim mothers will change, as she feels that she is also deserving of time spent purely to connect with Allah.
References:
[1] Al-Khateeb, A. (2018). The Power of Sabr: Patience in Islam. Islamic Speeches. [2] Al-Haddad, A. (2019). The Postnatal Period in Islam: A Comprehensive Guide. Islamic Online University. [3] Al-Mawrid, S. (2020). The Importance of Community and Mutual Support in Islam. Al-Mawrid Institute. [4] Al-Qur'an, S. (2021). The Qur'an and Parenting: A Guide for Muslim Parents. Al-Qur'an Society. [5] Al-Kawthari, M. (2020). The Etiquettes of Fasting and Its Benefits. Islamic Research Foundation International.
- Yousra, a new mother, nostalgically remembers her pre-motherhood Ramadan experiences as a time for extensive spiritual practices like Qur'an readings and taraweeh prayers.
- In her current situation, Yousra cherishes the moments of joy she shares with her son during Ramadan, such as singing nasheeds and making decorations, despite the challenges of balancing early motherhood and childcare.
- To navigate the spiritual aspects of Ramadan while managingher responsibilities, Yousra could consider strategies such as seeking help from family and friends, embracing imperfection, and finding flexible worship times.
- As Yousra strives to nurture both her faith and her family, she hopes for a change in the perception of Muslim mothers, understanding that they too deserve time for connection with Allah.
